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Glossary of Horse Terms

* Hock: Financial condition of all horse owners.

* Stall: What your rig does at rush hour in an unfamiliar city on the way to a big horse show .

* A Bit: What you have left in your pocket after you've been to your favorite tack shop.

* Fence: Decorative structure built to provide your horse with something to chew on.

* Horse Auction: What you think of having after your horse bucks you off.

* Pinto: Green coat pattern found on freshly washed light colored horses left unattended for 2 minutes.

* Well Mannered: Hasn't stepped on, bitten, or kicked anyone for a week.

* Rasp: Abrasive metal tool used to remove excess skin from ones knuckles.

* Lunging: Popular training method in which a horse exercises their owner by spinning them in circles until dizzy.

* Gallop: Customary gait a horse chooses when returning back to the barn.

* Nicely Started: Lunges, but not enough health insurance to even think about riding him.

* Colic: Gastrointestinal result of eating at horse fair food stands.

* Colt: What your mare gives you when you want a filly.

* Easy to Load: Only takes 3 hours, 4 men, a 50lb bag of oats, and a tractor with loader.

* Easy to Catch: In a 10x10 stall.

* Easy Rider: Rides good in a trailer; not to be confused with "ride-able".

* Endurance Ride: End result when your horse spooks and runs away with you.

* Hives: What you get when receive the vet bill for your 6 horses, 3 dogs, 4 cats, and 1 donkey.

* Hobbles: Walking gait of a horse owner after their foot has been stepped on by their horse.

* Feed: Expensive substance used to manufacture manure.

* Dog House: What you are in when you spend too much money on grooming supplies and pretty halters.

* Light Cribber: We can't afford to build anymore fencing or box stalls for this buzz saw on four legs.

* Three Gaited Horse: A horse that. 1) trips, 2) stumbles, 3) falls.

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